Hungry?

Do you ever just find yourself feeling hungry ... you're just not sure what for?

Have you ever found yourself at home on the prowl for a treat, a morsel of anything, even a peanut butter and jelly sandwich.  You stick your head in your pantry and all you find is a box of cereal that your 'ex' left behind, a can of black beans and some old nachos.  Next, you open every cabinet in your kitchen to realize that all you have are dishes, pots & pans, a box of mac&cheese and a bunch of spices on a shelf.  Not being in the mood for mac&cheese, you ask yourself ... "I wonder if oregano, garlic powder and dried chives would be good together?"  You wisely decide against that combo and move on ...

Ah-ha!  The refrigerator ... there's got to be something good in the refrigerator!  You run to the door, whip it open, packets of Taco Bell sauces fall off the door ("who put them there anyway?").  You are now standing in front of your 'frig' in a 'Superman' pose, chest puffed out,  ready to conquer the goodness that is stored in this fine Kenmore side-by-side.

Alas, there is nothing edible left.  There is a white foam box from your favorite Italian restaurant ... but you don't even open it, you're too scared.  You know you haven't been to that place in over a month and now is no time for a science experiment.  Your eyes land on a large transparent plastic container that holds what might possibly be a joyful and bountiful container of eggnog.  You turn the container to find the handle and realize that the label says "Milk" ... you scour the container for the 'best by' date and loosely interpret it to read:
              "If you value your life put this container down now!"

You've been searching long and hard now for some morsels to satisfy your hunger ... which has only made your hunger stronger, louder, more painful.  In a final act of desperation your hand moves to the vegetable drawer ... yes desperate times, desperate measures, you will settle for a salad!  You grasp the handle and close your eyes, you slide the drawer open and hear something rolling around, could it be ...?

Your eyes open and fall upon a tri-colored spherical object that you assume was once an orange.  Lying next to it is a clear plastic bag filled with something that is a shade of green you've never seen before and what might be more water than you drink in a day.

You are spent.  You've been conquered.  You sit on the floor in front of your still open Kenmore with your head leaning on your bent knees and your hands folded behind your head.  You realize now that the grocery shopping that you had been putting off would have really paid off at this very moment.  Defeated, you get up, close the refrigerator door and grab your car keys.  Your hunger, while not fed yet, has won.  You are now on a mission to feed that hunger.  As you get in your car, you realized an important lesson, you realize that it is best to be prepared for situations like these.


You will be hungry ... sometimes you won't know what for.  When you go to the 'grocery store' of life.  Load up on a variety things.  Try something new.  Take a class in pottery even if you don't like getting your hands dirty.  Go to a Korean BBQ restaurant even if Italian is your favorite, you might end up with two favorites.   Pick up a book on time management even if you don't think you need it. Take a yoga class even if you don't think your are stressed.

Trying new activities, reading new and challenging materials, tasting new cuisines will help you expand every aspect of your life.  You will have a bigger appreciation for all that our world has to offer.  Don't wait until you are hungry to shop around; be prepared, make sure you have choices available to you, passions that you can pursue!

Feed your hunger!

COASTERS - DON'T BE ONE!

Many, many things frustrate me, but the one that frustrates me the most these days is all of the "coasters" around me.  Specifically, I am referring to colleagues that show up to work, collect their paycheck and go home.

Yes, it does frustrate me when someone gets paid as much as me (in some cases more), but seemingly does their very best to work as little as possible.  This is one variant of the "coasters" that I am referring too.

However, the thing about coasters that frustrates me the most is that "coasters" don't contribute and/or they don't seem to grow. I blame Jim Rohn for the philosophy that I've adopted, which is "Don't just get through the day ... get from the day!"

I see so many people around me with unbelievable amounts of knowledge and experience ... but never share it!  Are they stingy or do they just lack confidence?  Are they too busy in their personal lives and I'm not aware because I've never connected with them?  To these "coasters" I say "GIVE!"  Find people who can benefit from your advanced knowledge.  Help others to learn from your mistakes and experiences.  Help others grow.  Most of all, don't stop challenging yourself, keep growing and help others grow.  You may feel that you "don't get paid" to do this -- who gives a crap, there are rewards that no company can compensate you for.  Try it you'll see!

And then there is an equal number of newer colleagues that don't seem to want to grow (I use to be one of these).  They show up for work and they wait to be spoon fed the information they need to not only conduct their job, but to excel at it.   They blame others if they aren't given the resources to out-perform (blame game).  They wait for a supervisor or colleagues to put new ideas in their heads and provide additional training/education.  To these "coasters" I say "SEEK!"  Go look for the answers.  Go look for more questions.  Challenge yourself.  Challenge those around you!  Just because you got a degree or an advanced degree doesn't mean you get to stop learning.

Coasting sucks.  Don't be a coaster.  Coasters on level ground don't get very far and are passed by everyone else; and life will leave them behind.  Coasters that are going downhill rely on momentum/gravity and have relinquished control over their destiny or future.  Neither is very attractive to me. 

I CHOOSE NOT TO BE A COASTER!  How about you?

ELEPHANT TASTES GREAT!

Elephant tastes great in the beginning ... then not so good towards the middle ... but finally, by the time you are done, it's the best thing you have ever eaten!

Of course, I am not talking about real elephant, I am talking about the metaphorical elephant (ME).  You know, the one that you eat "one bite at a time."  I have no desire to eat real elephant, but the ME one is a meal that I have to eat all the time; we all do.

At first glance, all ME's may look really, really BIG!  But as it turns out there are ME's of all different sizes.  Small, Medium, Large and some are even Super-Sized!  Often, you don't have a true appreciation for their size until you've made your plan of attack.  Then some previously thought to be gigantic ME's turn out to be not so big after all.  Some are just medium sized and others truly are really huge.  Regardless, it's your ME and you are going to conquer it!

So you see the challenge in front of you and you dig in to your elephant and the first bite tastes great!  Your mouth is watering for a second bite, you're excited, you grab your knife and you cut off a second piece, Mmmm, so good!  Then you chew a third, a fourth and a fifth bite and suddenly this ME is not tasting so good, maybe you should take a break?  So you take a short break (maybe a couple days off) just to get your hunger back.  Then your hunger comes back and you dig in again with even more vigor than your first sitting ... six, seven, eight bites this time, but it doesn't taste quite as good as the first sitting (maybe the meat has spoiled a little bit); and besides eight bites is a lot and you're full again.  So you think, maybe it's time for another break?  This time you take more than a few days off, you walk past a half eaten carcass several times a day. Sometimes you will look at it, other days you do you best not to look in it's direction.

A few weeks goes by and you are at a point where you have to decide "Do I finish eating this ME? Or do I just push the half eaten carcass over a cliff?"  At this point the only thing you remember about the taste of ME is that it is very filling, kind of bland and makes you really full, really fast.  But if you wait any longer it will spoil.  So you dig in, you take a few big bites and then you come up for air and realize "I am almost done."  You convince yourself that you can finish this elephant and as you get closer to the end the meat isn't rotten ... it's actually getting sweeter and sweeter.  You crave more and start eating faster ... until you're done, you've eaten your ME!  Congratulations!

The feast started out tasting great, then got painfully bland and finally the pendulum swung and it may have been the best meal that you have ever finished!

Now, here's the great news ... you don't have to eat your ME alone!  Some of the biggest elephants that you will ever have to eat are intended to feed 5 or 6 people!  There is plenty to go around and you will get full credit for conquering your ME, you just have to be willing to share!  People love to help!  Helping others feels good, contributing feels great.  Plus, getting help feels pretty good too.  And, not only does it make others feel good to help, they know when they have a giant ME at their dinner table you will be happy to reciprocate!  Everyone can conquer their ME's faster, without losing their appetite for the elephant and everyone will enjoy the feast!

Today is a great day to conquer your ME!

THE ONLY DIFFERENCE THAT MATTERS . . .

There are many, many differences between me, you and everyone else.  For instance:

My eye color is: Hazel     ... your's may be brown or blue,

My weight:  I won't divulge the bulge ... let's just say I am 25 pounds over where I want to be.  And you may be your ideal weight, more or less

My hair color?  First of all you have to have hair, then you can have hair color!  And yours might be red or blonde, short or long.

My skin is tan and white.  I live in Florida, so I've got year round farmer's tan.  And you, you may live in Wisconsin and you might be caucasion, so your skin is likely white.  And if you're not caucasian, you live in Wisconsin ... it's probably some shade of "freezer burn" white.

I am in my 40's and not getting younger.  And you might be in your 20's ... btw, you're not getting younger either!

But there is only one difference that matters and it is not the difference between me and you.  THE ONLY DIFFERENCE THAT MATTERS IS THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN 'CURRENT [INSERT YOUR NAME HERE]" AND "FUTURE [INSERT YOUR NAME HERE]".

Ten years from now you will not be the same person.  Just look back ten years and think about how you have changed.  Physically you are likely very different.  If you are 18, you are probably taller now and weigh more than when you were 8.  If you are 60, you are probably shorter now and weigh more than when you were 50.  That's just life..

Mentally you are probably different too.  No matter who you are and how old you are, hopefully you've matured, gained experience, gained knowledge and developed more of a sense of who you are and/or who you want to be.  If you've regressed in this area, that's unfortunate ... but it's not too late to move in a better direction!

Step 1) It's time to assess who you are.  Write down what you like in life, your favorite activities, your passions.  Write down your skills, talents, accomplishments.  And most important ... write down how you feel about who you are today.  Assess your health, wealth, spirituality, friends and connections in your community.

Step 2)  Knowing who you want to be next week, next year and at the end of the next decade of your life is not just next ... it's critical.  Not knowing who you want to be when you grow up (more) is like setting off on a vacation, but not knowing where you are going.  Will it be adventurous?  Maybe.  But it also could be the kind of adventure where you find your car careening off a mountain highway only to find yourself stuck in a ravene with no way out.  So take a few hours and write down who you want to be or what you want to change about yourself by next week, next month, next year, in 5 years and in 10 years.

Is Step 2 a lot of work?  Yes, but not as much work as climbing out of that ravene and trying to put your life back together!

Step 3)  Start.  Yes, it might be Nike it like ... but, just do it.  You don't need a 4 year degree to accomplish most of the things that you want to do or change about yourself.  But you do need to start.  Education and training is Step 5.  Most of the great minds or thinkers of our day are self taught.  They are not 'great' or admired because they went to Harvard or Princeton.  They are 'great' for what they have done or are doing.  So just start, whereever you are at start from there.

Step 4) Develop your plan(s).  Formalize your plan to achieve your goals.  It doesn't have to be a perfect plan.  No plan is perfect.  There are always going to be variables/obstacles that you can't predict that will pop up and derail you.  Put some effort into planning on what you need (experience/training and education) to become who you want to become. 

Step 5) Get educated.  Once you start to follow your plan/passions.  You will realize that there are books, magazines, lectures and seminars that will help you in the pursuit of your goals.  Be aware and be prepared to slow down to get the training, education or ideas that you will need to accomplish your plan.

Step 6) Have checkpoints.  As you work towards your goal make sure that you stop and reflect on your progress.  Many times, especially with bigger, longer term goals you will find that you aren't following the plan that you had originally developed.  THAT'S OK.  Check where you are at, make sure that your goal is still your goal and revise your plan with even more focus and passion towards achieving it.

What if your goals change, let's say you are no longer interested in becoming a Master Underwater Basket Weaver?  That's the great thing about the check points.  If you reach your 1st checkpoint and realize that you don't have the passion or interest that you thought you had ... then now is a good time to cross off that goal and go in search of a different passion.

There are far too many people who graduate from college and realize that the degree they earned in engineering doesn't help them much in getting a job in the field they are really passionate about ... illustrating for children's books.

If you know where you want to be, and when you want to be there ... even if you falter a little bit ... you will be closer to who you want to be and you'll get there sooner than most.

YOU ARE NOT HELPLESS!

As I watch the news and read the newspapers I realize one thing, in general:

They are appealing to the helpless and hopeless!

This is their target audience.  The "it's not my fault" crowd.  Which appears to be a growing crowd.

But you and I are not part of that crowd.  You and I are the ones who know that we control our own destinies. 

You and I don't have to be the same people in the same place five or ten years from now.

We can and will become the people that we want to be come.  The only thing stopping us IS us.

Set your goal, develop your plan, take your first step towards your goal today, this minute, now!

Do not wait until tomorrow ... tomorrow becomes the next day, the next week ... start this instant.

Set your goal, develop your plan, start.

Some of life's toughest battles happen between ...

Some of your life's toughest battles will happen between your own two ears!  Most of us will not join the military, we will not need to go to a foreign land to fight an unknown enemy.  Fortunately, most of us will not get cancer or contract a life threatening disease.  But we will fight many lesser battles, mostly in our minds.  And for some of us, we will fight tens, if not hundreds of these battles each day.

The battle is "Needs versus Wants".  Whether you are battling weight loss, financial problems, character problems, or all three (as well as many other enemies!)  When you step back and look at the battlefield from 30,000 feet ... it will be plain to see that it is a battle of "Need v. Want"

I face these battles every day and, sadly, many times I lose the battle.  Many times want wins over need.  I can predict which battles I will win and which I will lose.  And it is really quite simple ... I lose every battle where my desire or passion that I hold for the "want" exceeds that which I hold for the "need".  I lose every battle where I am not focusing on what is most important to me.  I lose every battle that I take my eyes off of my goals. 

My goals must became my "wants"; "wants" always win over needs. If I really want to accomplish my goals I must change my mantras from "I need to lose weight, I need to lower my cholesterol, I need to exercise, I need to pay off debt, ..." to "I WANT TO ..."

I have been losing the "battle of the bulge" because I want a beer after a hard day at work.  I justify it by saying to myself that "It's just one ... and besides it's a light beer, it's like drinking water!"   I know that it's a bad idea and goes against one of my most important goals, but I do it anyway because it's what I wanted at that moment ... I lost focus on what I really want, which is to lose weight and become healthier.  Salad and yogurt for lunch (two steps forward) and a beer and two much pasta for dinner (three steps back).  I need to want to lose weight more than I want the beer ... it's that simple.  Want will always win over need!

Another goal that is extremely important to me is becoming debt free.  Once this goal is achieved I would like to be able to drive the family up to Nashville so that the family and I can scream "We're debt free!" on the air with Dave Ramsey!  But the problem is ... I also want to enjoy things that other people around me are enjoying - NBA basketball games, MLB Spring Training, nice cars, nice clothes and fancy dinners out.  I want my children to have everything they want for Christmas and their birthdays, I want them to be able to do all the activities that they want (competitive cheer, dance, baseball lessons, etc).  In order for me to succeed with money and teach my children the need to delay gratification - I need to want to delay gratification myself.  I must want to be be debt free more than wanting all these things now.  I must want to wait for the nice things in life. 

I could go on with many other examples of how my wants or desires for things today are putting off my long term goals, but I won't.  The good news is, that while I (and you) may lose a lot of the battles ... I/you can still win the war!  "Fight the good fight!"  It will take time, but I (and you) can do it if we want it bad enough!

Paraphrasing Zig Ziglar, "I didn't put on 40 pounds too many overnight, I did it one spoonful at a time, I will have to lose the weight the same way in order to keep it off."   So, when you are trying to reverse the effects of negative habits ... don't expect them to be corrected overnight.  Maintain focus on what you really want, be patient and give it the time that it deserves!

The Law of Unintended Consequences

The Law Defined: The law of unintended consequences, often cited but rarely defined, is that actions of people—and especially of government—always have effects that are unanticipated or unintended.

 Most people have never heard of the "The Law of Unintended Consequences."  And, even if you were aware of it ... it's probably not something you actively think about and/or apply in your everyday life.  However, the law affects you every single day!  

If you are a coach, sports analyst, CEO, surgeon, business consultant, etc. you may make consider the law in your normal workday.  An offensive coordinator may find his team in a 4th down situation, on the 3 yard line, with 10 seconds left in the game ... needing three (3) points to tie and four (4) to win.  He's thinking that he wants to run a particular play [let's call it "Zebra 88 Amazon Blue"].  But first, he uses his last time out so that he can talk to his offense and discuss their options and what the defense may do if they run Zebra 88 Amazon Blue. 

A surgeon may be operating on a gunshot victim and has to look at all the potential consequences if he removes a bullet that is in a delicate spot or ... what if he leaves it in?  What will the victim's future quality of life be, will the bullet shift, will it have to be removed eventually anyway?

A CEO of a large company may be considering what will happen if his company suddenly drops a dying product line that their distributors count on for income ... or is phasing it out slowly going to suck up company resources and prevent the successful launch of a new product.  What will the customers think, can they afford to lose 30-50% of their customer base?

Being aware of the law and applying it on occasion is one thing ... applying it fully to every decision that you make is another.

Think of you as an individual, you are up later than usual and your stomach starts to growl.  Do you walk to the refrigerator and take a peek inside?  What harm could having one scoop of ice cream at 11:00 pm do ... just this once?  Would it start a habit of having a snack every night at such a late hour?  If so, will you switch to healthier snacks ... an apple perhaps?


As it turns out, if you give enough proper consideration there are very few consequences that you aren't able to predict.  Remember, everything matters, somethings just matter more.  So every decision that you make (or choose not to make) deserves some consideration ... make sure that you give your decisions enough proper consideration!

THE ANT: THE INSECT THAT I ADMIRE MOST!

Why would I want to write about ants?  Why do I admire them so?  Mainly for three reasons:

1) They are persistent -- no one will ever accuse an ant of being a quitter.  They don't care what is in their way and how big the task is.  They will figure out a way to get the job done.  If you see one marching on the ground and you put something in their way (like your foot) ... they will climb over or walk around.  If the leaf is too big to carry, they will bite off a size that they can carry.  The only time they will stop is if you yank off all six of their legs.  But please don't, that's cruel.

2) Their ability to delay gratification -- they have no problems working hard today and saving for a better tomorrow.  You've no doubt heard the Aesop's story of the Ant and the Grasshopper.  The Grasshopper decides that it wants to play instead of sowing and reaping from its efforts.  When the seasons change and food is not readily available he has nothing to eat.  The Ant however has stored up plenty for the hard times.  The Ant sowed, tended, harvested and saved up.  When bad times hit (which they always do) the Ant was ready!

3) Their FOCUS -- ants know their mission or their purpose.  They understand what they were put on earth for and they do it. They don't try to reinvent their role ... they accept their role and they do it, never straying from their task.

Ants are inspirational!  They're not sexy, they are not even cute.  Actually, they are quite ugly.  But they are inspirational.  Have a great day!

Victim ... no more!

It is now 2013 ... and I have but one resolution.

I WILL NO LONGER BE A VICTIM!  By this, I mean that I will no longer be a VICTIM OF CIRCUMSTANCE.  In 2013, I will not set the cruise control on my ride to my destiny.  I will be active in deciding the direction that I am heading and the magnitude at which I head towards my destiny.

There are many types of victims in this world.  You can be a victim of a: crime; failing school system; decaying neighborhood; solar radiation, etc.  Some things will just happen to you.  You just can't control everything.

However, your destiny does not have to be one of those things that "just happens".  If you are like me, you don't want to be sitting in a rocking chair some day when you are retired and wonder how you got there.  Or for that matter, why would you want to wake up 5 years from now and not know how and why you arrived where you are at?  Which would likely be at the same job, with the same pay, performing the same rote tasks.

I hope that you will join me in 2013 in choosing your direction and actively participating in arriving at where you want to be in 5, 10 or 20 years.

The first step will be acknowledging that you do have influence, if not full control, over your future and what you, as a person, become.  Regardless of what you might hear on the radio, read in the paper or see on T.V. - the government, your neighbors, your school teachers, your mommy & daddy are not the ones who are in charge of you ... unless you choose to let them.  So take charge of yourself, commit to yourself that you will shape your own future.  If you are going to be a victim of anything ... be a victim of your own decisions.  Whether you choose well or not, because it was your decision you will learn from your experience and make better decisions in the future.  Just don't be a victim of indecision, lack of control, lack of desire ... don't be a victim of circumstance!

Merry New Year!