Two of life's most important words - delayed and gratification!

Delayed and gratification are two very important words that many people don't seem to care for much these days.  The actual disdain for these words is evident when you put them together and say them out loud.  Go ahead, go stand in front of a mirror and watch your face as you say "delayed gratification" ICK!.

To many of us, it's a most awful and evil expression.  It's a declaration that gives permission to toil today, but to not see the results for days, dare I say ... months! GASP!

Why on earth would anyone want to put off until later the satisfaction of a desire that they could have today?  Most people don't want to, nor do they need to put it off.  In this day and age of instant: messaging; credit; wait loss; oil changes; and successes ... why should you have to wait for anything?  People are screaming from the rooftops "I WANT IT AND I WANT IT NOW!"

Why should you wait?  Well ... simply put "anything worth having, is worth waiting for."  It's an expression from a bygone age, but it's just as true now as it ever was.  The competition for your hard earned instant credit is fierce, which is actually to your advantage, if you can manage to slow down, take a breathe and think before you buy or do anything.  The maker of every product on every shelf is trying to figure out a way to get you to buy their product first and frequently!  And it's to their advantage if you don't do to much thinking before you buy!

Eventually though you will run out of cash, credit, time and/or health. And the very next day an opportunity comes up that would be the experience of a lifetime ... but you can't take advantage of it.  You are about to miss out on the ultimate vacation with friends or family because you've used all your sick days at work and you've maxed out your credit cards buying $5 lattes, $400 handbags and a variety of gemstone collars for your tabby (she just had to have it ... Meow!).

You have permission to delay gratification, like fine wine, many opportunities will be better in a few days ... or months!  YEA!

Some of life's toughest battles happen between ...

Some of your life's toughest battles will happen between your own two ears!  Most of us will not join the military, we will not need to go to a foreign land to fight an unknown enemy.  Fortunately, most of us will not get cancer or contract a life threatening disease.  But we will fight many lesser battles, mostly in our minds.  And for some of us, we will fight tens, if not hundreds of these battles each day.

The battle is "Needs versus Wants".  Whether you are battling weight loss, financial problems, character problems, or all three (as well as many other enemies!)  When you step back and look at the battlefield from 30,000 feet ... it will be plain to see that it is a battle of "Need v. Want"

I face these battles every day and, sadly, many times I lose the battle.  Many times want wins over need.  I can predict which battles I will win and which I will lose.  And it is really quite simple ... I lose every battle where my desire or passion that I hold for the "want" exceeds that which I hold for the "need".  I lose every battle where I am not focusing on what is most important to me.  I lose every battle that I take my eyes off of my goals. 

My goals must became my "wants"; "wants" always win over needs. If I really want to accomplish my goals I must change my mantras from "I need to lose weight, I need to lower my cholesterol, I need to exercise, I need to pay off debt, ..." to "I WANT TO ..."

I have been losing the "battle of the bulge" because I want a beer after a hard day at work.  I justify it by saying to myself that "It's just one ... and besides it's a light beer, it's like drinking water!"   I know that it's a bad idea and goes against one of my most important goals, but I do it anyway because it's what I wanted at that moment ... I lost focus on what I really want, which is to lose weight and become healthier.  Salad and yogurt for lunch (two steps forward) and a beer and two much pasta for dinner (three steps back).  I need to want to lose weight more than I want the beer ... it's that simple.  Want will always win over need!

Another goal that is extremely important to me is becoming debt free.  Once this goal is achieved I would like to be able to drive the family up to Nashville so that the family and I can scream "We're debt free!" on the air with Dave Ramsey!  But the problem is ... I also want to enjoy things that other people around me are enjoying - NBA basketball games, MLB Spring Training, nice cars, nice clothes and fancy dinners out.  I want my children to have everything they want for Christmas and their birthdays, I want them to be able to do all the activities that they want (competitive cheer, dance, baseball lessons, etc).  In order for me to succeed with money and teach my children the need to delay gratification - I need to want to delay gratification myself.  I must want to be be debt free more than wanting all these things now.  I must want to wait for the nice things in life. 

I could go on with many other examples of how my wants or desires for things today are putting off my long term goals, but I won't.  The good news is, that while I (and you) may lose a lot of the battles ... I/you can still win the war!  "Fight the good fight!"  It will take time, but I (and you) can do it if we want it bad enough!

Paraphrasing Zig Ziglar, "I didn't put on 40 pounds too many overnight, I did it one spoonful at a time, I will have to lose the weight the same way in order to keep it off."   So, when you are trying to reverse the effects of negative habits ... don't expect them to be corrected overnight.  Maintain focus on what you really want, be patient and give it the time that it deserves!