2018 is here! And you're not ready!

Oh my ... it's almost 2018 and you're not ready!

No, the new year is not like Christmas, Hanukkah or a dear friend's birthday.  You don't have to buy presents or plan a surprise party.  Although many of us will be partying in the new year and many of us will make resolutions.   There are some of us who will even keep those resolutions through the whole month of January (i.e. gym memberships)!  Others will resolve to do one thing (be kinder, do a good deed, give to a charity, etc.) and we will have until December 31, 2018 to accomplish it.  Yeah us!

Unfortunately, just because you decided where you will be when the ball drops and have even given some thought to what you will resolve to accomplish in 2018 ... you are not really ready for the new year.   Or at least, you are not really ready for a meaningful, purposeful, fulfilling, AWESOME 2018 ... until/unless you have already reviewed 2017.

There are many resources available online that can give you a framework to reflect on 2017 and your accomplishments.  I would like to recommend that you "google" it and find a process/plan/form that you like.  Don't worry if you pick the wrong one at first, every day can be your New Year ... your first day of your next 365.  So you can always try a different process until you find one that works for you!

As for me, (see graphic below) I am going to reflect on 2017 by listing out the positives and negative memories/events of the year, highlighting the more important or critical ones and set goals for 2018.  This should take me less than thirty minutes.

I will later go back and select the top three or four things I want to accomplish in 2018 and develop a plan on how to accomplish each goal, what resources and time commitment is required and then perhaps add more goals to my 2018 plan ... but only if it looks like my time and resources will permit me to accomplish more.

If you can only believe in one thing ...

If you can only believe in one thing ... believe in yourself.  Believe that you can achieve, that you have the skills.  And if you don't have the skills yet ... that you will acquire the skills.  Believe in yourself, believe that you can ... believe that you will!

If you can believe in two things ... believe in yourself and believe in God.  God already believes in you, your uniqueness and your abilities.  He needs you to believe in yourself as much as he does.

Have a blessed day!

Can potpourri be good?

What is potpourri?  According to Merriam-Webster the words origins are French and it's literal meaning is "putrid pot".  Ick!

Today potpourri is most commonly associated with a good smelling blend of flowers, herbs and spices.   Depending on your olfactory ... some potpourri can certainly be putrid ... but to most, it is pleasant.

Not that I've been shopping around for potpourri or studying it at length, it's really not my thing.  But I do recall that my mom loved potpourri and I also remember that it was never just one flower, one spice, one orange peel.   It was always a blend of several of the aforementioned.  It was a variety.  And the variety dictated the scent, different variety ... different scent ... still potpourri

As the saying goes "variety is the spice of life."  I believe that this is true.  Variety certainly keeps things interesting.   And the variety you choose will decide how interesting your life is.  So try new foods, new experiences ... the variety will give you perspective that you didn't have before.  And if you don't like the new experience or food, you will appreciate the things you do like even more.

Potpourri can be good ... make your life a potpourri!  Start today, try something new and different.  So what if you don't like the experience or the food item.  At least now you'll know.  

Have a blessed day!
Tubby

Make Today "Opposite Day!"

Stop and reflect on any aspect of your life.

• Your character/principles
• Your health
• Your friends
• Your finances
• Your spirituality
• Etc.

Are you happy with all of the above?  Could you be happier?  Could you be healthier?  Could you have better friends?  Would you like your life to be the opposite of what it is now ... or at least find yourself in a better, happier place?

Ouch, be careful with the friend question ... you don't want to hurt anyone's feelings.  But seriously, if the friends you have or the finances you have aren't who and what you want them to be then set your sights today on doing the opposite of what you you've been doing!

Maybe you are spending way too much time with John/Jane and they've got some bad habits.  Maybe they like to have fun and party two nights (or more?) every weekend ... or maybe they like to go out every night after work for a drink.  As Jim Rohn says ... "you've got to be smarter than that!"

Maybe you don't have to quit your friends cold turkey.  But if you have higher aspirations in life you may want to consider cutting back the time you spend with them.  Or if they are good friends, maybe you lead them down a different path where you can all grow and prosper.  Do the opposite of what you've been doing and you'll be amazed at where it takes you (and maybe your friends)!

The same goes with your finances.  You may not have to quit spending money all together.  But you need some controls and a plan so that you don't find yourself at 65 years old and wondering which one of your kids will take you in and care for you in your golden years.  I wonder why they call them "golden years" ... maybe if you plan well they can truly be golden?  Get on a budget and, a la Dave Ramsey, tell your money what to do!  You'll be amazed at how your bank account or retirement fund grows!

Look at your health!  Twenty or more pounds overweight and you scratch your head wondering where the belly came from.  You know exactly where it came from.  Metabolism caught up with you and you've slowly cut back on all your activities over the years ... except for eating!  Start moving again and get on a right sized, balanced and nutritious diet.  [Please see a doctor for suggestions].  Put the fork down and pick up some weights or tie on a pair of sneakers.  When you see a piece of apple pie turn away and head for the whole apple!  Do the opposite of what you've been doing and you'll be amazed at the results!

Make today "Opposite Day!"  And have an even more blessed day than usual!

Are you in the funk zone?

Do you ever find yourself in the "funk zone?"  What is funk anyway?

My beautiful Lori and I were recently visiting Santa Barbara and went through the "Funk Zone."  In Santa Barbara the "Funk Zone" is not a terrible place.  Rather, it's the opposite!  It has boutique wine tasting rooms, cafes, galleries, shops and night clubs.  In the musical sense, it's really more of the funky zone.  Santa Barbara's Funk Zone is a fun and happy place!

In the traditional sense, being in a funk or in the funk zone is not quite as entertaining or joyful.  Being in a funk means that you are sad, depressed or melancholy.  Let's say you get your report card and your grades are worse than you thought, for the next week you might be in a funk.  Or your best friend moves to another city ... in another state ... on the other side of the country ... you are now in the funk zone.  Or your girlfriend/boyfriend breaks up with you.  No doubt that we've all been there, whether we defined it as such or not.

Time is needed to travel out of the funk zone, but how much time depends on whether or not you allow yourself to linger in this state.  Yes, it is up to you!  The longer you linger the deeper your funk zone will get, making it even harder to get out.  Sadness is an important part of life; as it's been said in many different ways, happiness would have little meaning if you didn't know the feeling of sadness.

Moving from sadness to happiness, or from a funk to funky, can be achieved with a few simple steps.  Notice that I said the steps are simple, the process isn't necessarily easy, but the steps are simple:

1. Acknowledge that you are sad or in a funk.  Many times people around you will ask "what's wrong?" Possibly agitating you.  Realize that they care and they noticed you are acting different.
2. Identify what is causing your funk.  This may or may not be obvious to you.  Maybe a pet died, a friend moved away, or you didn't get a promotion at work.
3. Accept that bad things happen and we don't always get everything we want.  However, as the famous Rolling Stones song says "but if you try sometimes you just might find that you get what you need."
4. Cliche alert!  Visualize your happy place!  Remember the good times that you've had with the pet or your friend.  If you'd rather not ... then imaging yourself at the beach watching a sunset or in the mountains with no distractions, just you and nature!
5. Understand that this isn't the end ... it's the beginning of another chapter of your life -- THAT YOU GET TO WRITE!
6. Write the next chapter of your life.  Yes LITERALLY WRITE DOWN WHAT YOU WANT THE NEXT CHAPTER OF YOUR LIFE TO LOOK LIKE!  Don't make it all rainbows and gumdrops, wishing for the easy life.  Write some challenges into your next chapter.  Grow your skills, your mind, your spirit!
7. Begin to live out that chapter

Have a blessed day!

Whatever it takes ... really?

Have you ever heard the expression "Whatever it takes"?

Have you ever said "Whatever it takes"?

Did you mean it?

Think about that phrase and those words and what they truly mean.  It's not a phrase that should be used casually ... but I for one, hear it pretty often.

Just know that if you say "whatever it takes!"  You are saying that you will travel to the ends of the earth.  You will give it your all.  You will utilize every resource at your disposable: time, money, energy.   You won't stop until you die!

That is what is meant by "whatever it takes!"

In order to fulfill that commitment you will have to act like the ant.  They truly do "whatever it takes!"  They are ultra focused and only have one mission at a time, they will stop at nothing.  If you see one marching down the sidewalk and you put your foot in it's path it will climb over your foot, go around your foot, go under your foot ... whatever it takes.  You could build a brick wall in it's path and it will keep going until it gets around the wall and fulfills its destiny ... or dies.

So the morale ... if you use the phrase "whatever it takes" ... mean it.  And if you use the phrase "whatever it takes" it'd be wise of you to be ant focused, ant intense, ant impassioned!

Have a great and blessed day!

Being "that guy" or "that girl"

I guess today you find me bragging on myself ... but I am "that guy" and you should be too.

As I talk to friends and colleagues there seems to be one thing that all of us who own phones (which is all of us) are plagued by:

               1) Erroneous, constant and annoying calls from telemarketers & fundraisers

Like many, I have a personal and a work cell phone ... plus, I still have a landline at the house!   Everyday there is a minimum of two calls to each of my numbers that are from the dreaded fundraisers or telemarketers.  Most of the time they don't pronounce my name correctly, some of the time they call asking for the ex-wife - correcting them doesn't seem to matter, they just say (paraphrasing) "oh, gee ... guess you'll do."  And, without fail, if you don't answer they don't leave a message.  Safe to say, they didn't really need to talk to you!

Today was a little different.  I received a call from an unknown number that was from a city I've never been to, or, done business with.  I was busy at the time, so I didn't answer.  When I wasn't busy I noticed that there was a voicemail, curiosity got the best of me, so I listened to the voicemail!

The message was a mis-dialed call from a man who sounded like he owned a small well drilling/servicing business and was calling someone back about a potential job.

      [Here's where I pat myself on the back ...]

Visions were running through my head of a guy who is trying to make a living servicing customers who desperately need water!  Of course I had to let him know that he got the wrong number!   Someone out there was dying of thirst or couldn't shower because their well pump wasn't working.   Immediately, I texted him and let him know that he called a wrong number.  I felt it was the right thing to do.

Regardless of the visions that ran through my head, the right thing to do was to let him know he reached the wrong person.  It only took me one minute to send the man a text and I've got 1,440 everyday that I get to choose how to use.  The action that I took is what used to be known as "common courtesy."

I felt it was a good use of my time ... and then this happened ...

The mystery well driller texted back!  It was a simple "thank you."

Another example of "common courtesy!"

And then, I knew it was a good use of my time!  Please be "that guy" or "that girl" today.

Thank you and have a blessed day!

Why can't they just give me a pill or something?

Many times people (okay, I) wish it were that easy.  Just "give me a pill and make "it" better ... make "it" go away.  But life isn't that easy ... it's not supposed to be that easy.  If it were that easy life would be miserable. 

Twice this week I've heard inferences to "instant" cures.  The "give me a pill" phrase was from someone who knows that their situation is a lot more complicated than one pill ... but refuses to believe it. 

The second time was a TV commercial for a product that I will call "Nutri-fast-ish"; a diet plan company.  The spokesperson actually used the words "lose the weight today!"  As Zig Ziglar said "I put the weight on one spoonful at a time.  It's not coming off instantly.  It's going to take awhile."

Before you get up in arms and consider lecturing me, first those were Zig's words about himself ... and second, they apply to many, but not all of us!

The point is more often than not "we" are looking for the easy way, the quick cure, instant results.  That's not how you ended up wherever you are ... and that's not how you will make your way to your dream destination.

So as Les Brown says "If you only do the easy things, life will be hard.  But if you do the hard things, life will be easy!"  Stop looking for the short cut or the easy way.  Look for the sure thing!  And when you find out that there is hard work or effort required don't start your search over, dig in and put forth the effort.

You may think that having an "easy button" would bring tremendous joy, but joy doesn't come from getting everything you want, when you want it. The pride and jubilation you will feel when you reach your "dream destination" from knowing that it was your effort that got you there will far outweigh the cost (a.k.a. the hard work) it took to get there!

Have a blessed day!
Tubby

What doesn't kill you ... makes you stronger(?)

One thing is for sure, what doesn't kill you definitely doesn't kill you.

But whether or not it makes you stronger is up to you.

Not if, but WHEN you are faced with a new challenge, sickness or crisis (assuming it doesn't kill you), who you become after the event is entirely up to you!

You get to choose a perspective that allows you to get stronger, smarter, better ... OR ... you can choose a perspective that you have been weakened, you have been broken, you are less of a man/woman.  Keep in mind, not choosing is a choice to be broken by the event.

So, the choice is yours, will you allow what doesn't kill you to make you stronger?

Take a few minutes and 'Google' examples of people who have persevered or over-come obstacles and challenges -- there are a million examples, you can be one of them!

Have a blessed day!

Due, Owed, Obliged ...

Nobody OWES you anything!  You ain't DUE nothing! (How's that for proper English?)

Keep in mind that unless you are under contract and you have fulfilled your obligations ... then no one is obliged to you for anything! Let's say you've work thirty years for the same company, they've indicated they want to go in a different direction ... no gold watch or party on retirement day?  Or you are entering your office building one morning and you hold the door open for someone that seems to be in a big hurry, but they don't hold the elevator for you? Hmmm?

Yes, there is always the "law of reciprocity"; but it's not a law that if you break it (when you break it) you will have to worry about serving 8-10 in a minimum security prison.  Rather, you will be met with a worse fate: broken relationships or at least relationships that don't start well.

Remember the person that you held the door for, but they didn't hold the elevator for you is waiting upstairs in your office because they are your 9:00 am interview.  How do you suppose this one is going to go?

The day after you retire you're contacted by a headhunter that is working for your old company's biggest competitor.  The career you just retired from, which started right after college, may not be over after all ... you're only fifty-four years old, there's still fire in your belly, why not keep working?

It might sound selfish, but you need to do things because you want to do them, because they make you happy, because they fulfill you.  Don't do something with the expectation that the kind gesture or loyalty will be returned.  If it is reciprocated then consider it a bonus.