They didn't quit!

On Monday April 15, 2019 my beautiful wife Lori and I had the opportunity to cheer on the athletes that were participating in the 123rd running of the Boston Marathon.  We were also blessed that our vantage point was along the notorious Heartbreak Hill!

I am sure that Heartbreak Hill is not the longest or steepest hill in the world.  And it may not be the longest or steepest in the running world either.  But what I can tell you is that it starts right after mile marker twenty and if you are an exhausted runner staring up from the base it looks like it may go on forever.  Needless to stay it can be very intimidating and can break your mental will.

We spent several hours on the hill watching thousands of runners pass by.  And while the weather on this race day was not the worst they've ever seen ... it was definitely unpredictable.  I grew up in  New England so I wasn't bothered much by the sudden changes on this "Spring" day, Lori however was much more susceptible to sudden and constant changes in temperature, wind, sunshine and moisture.   Coat on, gloves on.  Gloves off, coat off.  Coat on, gloves on.  Coat off, gloves off.  Rain coat on, rain coat off.  Suns out, get more water. Here comes more clouds, coat on ...

Though the temperatures weren't extreme (if you were just watching the race), the need for appropriate weather gear was there.  If you were a runner on heartbreak hill while there was a light shower you probably welcomed it.  However, if the sun was out while you were climbing this hill and heading towards mile marker twenty-one you were probably hating life and questioning why you ever committed to this run.

Despite the weather changes and Heartbreak Hill we did not see a single runner quit.  There were many that ran by very focused, seemingly oblivious to the cheering crowds that lined the course.  There were quite a few runners that reached out for a high-five and inspiration.  There were even a few that slowed down to dance to the beats that the Lululemon DJ was pumping out.  And, yes, there were also plenty that passed by with the "joy of running" on their faces [ironic inside joke: I say this to my wife when we are out running and I see someone that doesn't look like they want to be out there running either].  But none of these people quit.

I have no idea what happened after they climbed Heartbreak Hill and perhaps there were even a few participants that didn't quite make it to heartbreak hill.  But from my vantage point I didn't see any quitters!

With most goals you don't have to come in first to be a winner.  Not quitting can be winning!  Finishing can be winning!  And, starting is definitely winning if it's the Boston Marathon!

         Interesting facts from an article posted on January 19, 2014 at MarathonTrainingSchedule that prove "Starting is winning!":
         15. "... running for an hour a few times a week can lower your blood pressure readings 12mgs
         25. "... approximately 0.5% of the U.S. population has run a marathon"
         35. "Running (and preparing for a marathon) improves job performance."

Have a blessed day!

Step #5 - Monitor and Adjust

You've got to keep your eye on your destination, your dream-goal.  If it looks like the course you're on is not taking you to your destination then you have to be prepared to adjust. 

You can't keep your nose down 24/7.  You have to periodically pause, look up and verify that you are still on course to your dream-goal.  You also need to verify that your destination is still relevant (to you and/or the marketplace).

This doesn't necessarily mean that your plan was wrong or flawed.  There usually isn't a short, straight line from start to finish in life.  There are headwinds and cross-currents that can blow you off course. The economics may change, resources can become scarce, committed parties can back out.

These things happen in life.  If your dream-goal is truly worth it then you will stay focused, you will "tack" and you will you keep your project heading towards success!

Stay focused and make sure that you are still passionate about completing your dream-goal.  This is the "why" that will keep you going!

Have a blessed day!

Step #4 - Execute

Now it is time to execute.  Put your plan into action!

You've created your plan, checked it and double checked it.

You've created your timeline.

You've lined up your resources.

Execute.  Jump in.  DO IT BEFORE YOU GET COLD FEET!

Have a blessed day!

Step #3b - Reiterate your destination

The next question you have to ask yourself is "Am I really heading towards your dream-goal?"  Verify/affirm what your destination is - what your dream-goal looks like when you launch/achieve it -- and review the steps of your plan.

You'll need to take a critical look at your plan and enlist experts to provide feedback (especially people who won't care if they hurt your feelings when they are critical about your "baby").

You'll need to ask yourself the following questions about your plan and timeline:

1) Does it get me to my dream-goal?

2) Is it efficient and effective?

3) Is my timeline realistic?

The answers to both of the above may change as you start to execute your plan.  But knowing what you know now, are the answers to the above yes?

If answer to #1 is no, you need to stop and take a hard look at your plan.  If the answer to #2 is no, ask yourself how much time are you wasting and is it worth revamping the plan.  And, of course, if the answer to #3 is no then you must adjust, but be aggressive.  You can adjust it again as necessary.

And then you are ready for Step #4 - Execute!

Have a blessed day!

Step #3a - Build your timeline

You've got your plan ... FANTASTIC! Now, what is your timeline?  "Huh, timeline?"  Yes, you need a timeline and yes it needs to be part of your plan ... that's why I'm calling this step #3a.

What are your drop dead dates for key milestones and what is your ultimate deadline -- when do you launch/reach your dream-goal?

I mentioned in Step #2 the importance of having someone hold you accountable.  But what is accountability without a timeline?  Answer, annoying!  I can hear your accountability partner right now saying "Are you done yet?" ... "Are you done yet?" ... "Are you done yet?"

Accountability without a timeline is unacceptable.  There might be some dream-goals that wouldn't require a timeline, such as being a good person, a good parent, etc.  Those should be never ending dream-goals. But most dream-goals (personal development, building wealth/reducing debt, launching a business) should have a timeline with milestones and drop-dead dates.  You have to keep yourself focused and there is almost nothing better for focus than a deadline or a drop-dead date!  Plus wouldn't you rather hear your accountability partner say "How is it going on Step 9ii?  Will you be done by March 29th?  Or do you need to adjust your timeline?  How can we get you back on track to meet your deadline?"

Hopefully you see the benefit of milestones with drop-dead dates.  They really will help you throughout your development stage all the way to launch day.  But during the planning and development stages of your dream-goal your timeline might be more guesswork than reality.  You need to press yourself when it comes to your timeline, but you still need to be grounded in reality.  There may be legs of your journey where you are dependent on others (suppliers) for completion and until you have contracted the supplier your timeline may not be realistic.

Of course your goal when sourcing a supplier will be to find one that can meet your timeline - they work for you right?  But let's say you've met with four candidates and three of the four tell you that there is no way for them to meet your deadline, even if you were their only customer.  But the fourth supplier says "no problem" I would heavily scrutinize this candidate and their references, as well as make sure that you have penalties in your contract if they miss the agreed upon deadline.

Once you've contracted your suppliers adjust your timeline accordingly and hold yourself accountable!

Have a blessed day!

Step #3 - Make your plan

Its obvious to most that you need to make a plan in order to achieve your dream-goal, right? We're use to making plans for many things in life.

You want to go to the beach?  Make a plan!  A plan can be simple:

• Pack snacks
• Leave at 7 am
• Head to "famous" beach
• Have fun
• Head home

The above is a simple plan ... it's lacking a lot of detail and I'd say it is more of an outline of a plan than an actual plan.  Especially if the famous beach you want to go to is Waikiki Beach and you don't live on Oahu.  Let's say you live in Seattle ... about 2,700 miles away ... by plane or boat!

Your plan needs to have:

• Starting point - where are you now?
• A timeline with detailed steps and a DEADLINE
• Ending Point - what does success look like?
• Contingencies - what if step "C" gets messed up?
• Two budgets - One for time and one for money! 

So the plan to go to a famous beach needs to take more things into consideration:

• That you are starting in Seattle
• That you want to leave on a certain date (and return on another date)
• That your destination is Waikiki (you'll probably need a place to stay)
• What if there is no place to stay at Waikiki - where else might you stay?  What if you can't afford the cost or the time in going to Oahu - where else could you go?
• What is your money budget?  You've got to be able to get there and back, right?
• What is your time budget?  What are you going to do in Waikiki and when are you going to do it?  

The bigger your dream-goal is the better/more detailed your plan needs to have in it!

Have a blessed day!

Step #2: Be Held Accountable!

Eventually you will see and understand that all of the steps to achievement/success are a must ... but this one is probably the most over-looked and under appreciated step.

You absolutely must be held accountable for your dream-goal!  And for most of us, dare I say all of us, you will need an accountability partner (AP) or mentor.  Could you do it yourself?  Maybe, but probably not.  This is especially important if you have super-sized your dream-goal!  Your dream-goal is too important to not subject it to criticism (so that you get it right) and support (from people who care enough to want you to succeed).

Photo by Joshua Earle - Zermatt, Switzerland

It is YOUR VISION, YOUR DREAM, YOUR GOAL!  Having an outsider is extremely helpful for the days when you lose focus, hit a wall or lose confidence.  This person(s) needs to be allowed to be critical and supportive.  You need to make sure that this person(s) knows what your goal is, why you want to achieve it and when you want to achieve your goal.  This person(s) needs to know these things because they will need to remind you of what you are trying to achieve, why you what to achieve it and what your deadline is.  This person(s) needs to care enough about you and your goal that they can also be candid with you.

What be better would be to have more than one AP.  And even better than that would be to have multiple APs with experience in helping others achieve their goals.  They will bring experience, criticism, contacts and directions.  For many people helping others achieve their dream-goals is more fulfilling than achieving their own.  The APs are out there, build yourself a team of them and let them help you achieve your dream-goals!

Step #1 - Have a dream

Up ...

Step one is to have a dream.  Yes it is that simple, just start with a dream!  What do you really want to do for a career?  Who do you want to become?  How do you want to help society?  Where do you want to travel?  Start dreaming!

But don't stop there.  Next you have to take your dream(s) and super-size it(them).  Yes, make it bigger.  Stretch your dream as far as you can imagine it.

Perhaps your dream was to travel to London or Paris.  Nice dreams ... but why not stretch it and quantify it?  A trip to London from the United States might only require a week off from work.  But a super-sized dream might have you taking a two month sabbatical to travel to London, Paris, Munich, Rome ...

Up ...

I definitely mean to super-size in a healthy way of course.  If your doctor suggested you lose twenty pounds don't make it a dream and super-size it to one hundred pounds.  Or you might instead turn the dream of losing weight into a dream of becoming a healthier person ... and super-size that dream!

Now you must write it down.  In order for your dream to become more than a dream (a.k.a. A GOAL) you must write it down.  And by write it down I mean on an actually piece of paper.  Studies have shown that physically writing things down activates parts of your brain that typing into a computer never will.

And away!

When you are done writing down your super-sized dream your next step is to write down "WHY" you want to achieve your dream (now goal).  This part is almost as critical as having a dream in the first place.  The dream is the spark that gets you focused, but the "Why" is the fuel that feeds your engine and keeps you focused on your goal.

The final part of step one is having an accountability partner.  You need to announce your new goal to a friend or family member who loves you enough to hold you accountable.  They need to care so much about you that they will check in with you and remind you of what you are supposed to be focused on and why!  And they love you so much that they are okay with being annoying and pissing you off once in awhile in order to keep you on track.

Have a blessed day!

The #1 Reason why you didn't achieve your goal!

Without a doubt the number one reason why you didn't achieve your goal(s) was because you really didn't have one!  That's right you didn't have a goal.

Oh, you may have thought you had a goal.  But if we're being honest with ourselves ... it was really more of a wish, wasn't it?

Wishes are great, wishes are awesome!  But wishes are something that you make when you are blowing out your birthday candles, when you find an eyelash on your cheek or when see a unicorn.

But please don't mistake a wish for a goal.  They may start out sounding the same ... but that is where the similarity ends.  In fact, if we're still being honest, I don't think any of us really think that a wish will ever come true.

My mom (God rest her soul) wished for years that she could go to Paris.  It never happened.  There were a lot of reasons (a.k.a. excuses) why her wish never came true.  But the main reason why she never went to Paris was because her wish stayed a wish.  She never made it a goal.  There was no planning involved.  Yes, she repeated her wish numerous times through the years, but her wish never turned into a goal.

My wife and I set a goal early in 2018 to celebrate a momentous birthday (I won't say which one) together in Paris.  My momentous birthday was in June of 2018 and hers would be in August of 2019.  We figured we would treat ourselves to the trip somewhere between the two birthdays.  We set the wheels in motion and started planning and saving.  Then she got some good news from work that she had to go Paris in September ... BAM!  It was done, we now knew our travel dates and kicked our planning into high gear.

Yes, there was some good fortune that came our way.  Her travel was covered by a work trip, but the rest was on us.  Would the "for work" Paris trip have ever happened if we hadn't put our goal out into the universe and start making plans?  Maybe, but maybe not.  Could we have both gone if we hadn't started planning in advance, yes ... but not without thousands of dollars of debt.  We were able to spend a week in Paris exploring and enjoying the food, culture and museums without having to bring credit card debt or stress back to the US with us.  That made the trip even more enjoyable.

Wishes are nice ...

but goals are definitely better!

Have a blessed day!

Make every day a 10!

Why not make every day a ten (10)?  Is it possible?  Maybe, maybe not ... but you won't know unless you try.  Certainly everyday can't be a one (1), can it?

If you "woke up not dead again" today (thank you Willie Nelson) then you are already starting at like a five ... or at least a four.  You certainly aren't starting at zero. 

So what's the secret to getting from your starting point to a ten?  It's actually pretty simple, just focus on an attitude of gratitude.  And if you "woke up not dead again" you definitely have something to be grateful for.  You have to learn to appreciate what you have, where you are at and who you have in your life.

You don't have to accept what you have, where you're at or who is in your life.  It's possible that you don't like some (maybe much) of all of the aforementioned ... but none of that has to be permanent.  This is great news!  Now you know where you don't want to be, who you don't want to be with and that you want more or better things in your life.  You've got a starting point.  And if you've got a starting point then it sounds like today is going to be a ten!

Don't get down on yourself.  You're not stuck unless you choose to be. Our world is filled with options and opportunities!  And as Paul Thorn sings in his song "That's life" ... "behind the clouds the sun still shines ... enjoy the journey that's life."

Have a blessed day ... I know I will!

Stopping is so much easier!

It's become quite obvious to me that stopping is easier than starting.  Even more obvious is that stopping is a million times easier than continuing!  I've started many times in life (this blog being just one example); and I've started over many times too!  The reason to start something over is either because that something is important to me or because I think it should be important and is worthy of trying again.

Since I am have no problem starting "things" and I have no problem re-starting "things", it's logical that where I fall down is in the area of continuing.  Perhaps we all fall short in this area?

No doubt that in my case it's because I lose focus on my "why" ... or worse, maybe I wasn't as passionate or as interested in "it" as I thought I was?  Maybe my "why" wasn't BIG enough to push away all the other distractions in life?

For 2019, I am making my primary goal to be honest with myself about my "why's" (a.k.a. my level of passion).  As a secondary goal I am going to focus on creating a cadence and building momentum so that I can create the good habit of continuing.  This coming year will be the year that I will continue towards my goals with purpose ... and if I stop doing something it too will be with purpose.

Happy New Year and God Bless!